Options

Given my last post, the Easy Button takes on a whole new meaning.  I'm not ready to press just yet, but d*mn I am so tempted sometimes.  It is of course concerning because I really don't have a tough life.  I am soft and untested.  (Not successfully tested that is, I have failed many such, and I continue to do so.)  When a real test comes along I am afraid I will fold like the proverbial house of cards.

I also mentioned earlier that 1 out of 3 is kind of bad.  Well now it's 0 out of 3.  I am at this very moment munching on crackers not intended to be part of this diet, and swilling coffee with powdered creamer.  (The latter is part of my regular diet but certainly not irreprehensible.)  I suppose that I will start again after the new year.  I actually intend to take several days off (5) and try to relax a bit.  I haven't planned it at all and I really need to do so or else it will turn into a nrop fest leaving me again begging forgiveness and very possibly in front of another censure committee.  A df decision could lead to the death of my surviving parent.  It isn't like Christ with the weight of the world on my shoulders, it is just like me with more than I can carry even though it isn't a heavy load at all.  I continue to be so ashamed of myself.

So there are a number of options, 1) visiting my surviving parent, 2) visiting my house down south, 3) visiting my house way down south, 4) a staycation, 5) a location (local vacation - staying in a hotel near several points of interest) 6) a real vacation.  The latter is likely too expensive especially planned at the last minute such as it is now.  #5 is also pretty expensive especially with the transportation bills I recently incurred.  I visited my surviving parent recently (#1) - a good visit, but it was enough and longer visits become really uncomfortable.  #2 is a must.  That has got to happen but I could make it largely perfunctory and not a working time at all.  I do need to get it ready with phone line and cable.  Just being there is stressful.  #3 is worse still.

Finally I could do a staycation and maybe focus on come clean-up and do something "fun" on 3 or 4 days locally.  The only images that come to mind harken back to the days of my earliest posts.  Not good, very expensive and again in a situation as mentioned in the second paragraph of this post.    So #2 & #4 it is brief visit to my house down south followed by a staycation focusing on 3 fun things and working around the house.  Fun things might include going out to eat or going to a museum.  None seem really doable.  That is affordable and fun enough to actually plan.  I know the feel of this.  Spend a lot of money to have a nice time or spend nothing and waste your time off.  That is what this is boiling down to.  The result is just so d*mn predictable.

Life, it just isn't so easy at all is it.  Hence the label attached to the final option.