Another day another post. Why? I have no clue. I prayed a lot yesterday and then again this morning. I am trying to thank God for the good things he provides rather than all prayers just asking for stuff. A few days ago I thanked him for the super interesting and complex world of subatomic particles and the cool and strange behaviors at the quantum level. Today I thanked him for women.
That escort I met a couple of posts ago still haunts my mind. I know that we will never be friends but she just seems like the epitome of so much of the good things that a woman might be. She is beautiful, tall, smart, takes care of herself, kind hearted and likes kids. Wow, what a combination. But, she is way too expensive for me to form a friendship. Honestly I'll probably never see her again. In any case though, if I do God's will then eventually I might befriend a woman like that. They can be some pretty awesome creatures.
Back at work now. This post sees me avoiding working on my performance review. Oh well, I can't put it off forever.
But just a little longer . . .
So the latest depressing thoughts is a continuation of the earlier rant. So things are going better in the last couple of days, praying a lot, doing bible reading and reading WBTS publications. I have to wonder how long this will last. I know it is just a matter of time before it all falls apart. I don't want that to happen but history indicates that it will. It is a sad thought. I want to believe I can change but I have been wanting to change for the last decade or more. Hasn't happened yet. Maybe it's today. As I've said earlier, God only knows. I keep hoping that this is the time. But I just know that, statistically speaking, it is very unlikely.
Crap!
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