How do I change the trajectory of my life? How do I make serving God more important than anything else? The answer is some combination of study, meetings, prayer, service and association. The big 5 incorporate all the key aspects. Of course it all falls under love of God and love of neighbor. However, the big 5 is what love looks like in action.
2 - 3 days later
It is becoming obvious that my depression symptoms are coming back stronger now. Over the weekend my son posted on the church bulletin board about how badly the congregation has mistreated him. What really appears to be happening is that he is not happy and he is looking for someone to blame. Strike that, he finds someone to blame anywhere he looks. Those trying to help get blamed. So she posted her treatise blaming the church on a public review board.
That turned into a whole thing. I read it as a cry for help, but when I reached out, she and her husband declined any offer for assistance.
This has brought home what a failure I have become. No major area of my life has succeeded. I feel badly all the time. With the paralysis brought on by the depression, it seems like there is nothing I can do to fix this.
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